{"id":3664,"date":"2018-01-01T11:15:15","date_gmt":"2018-01-01T16:15:15","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/gnhuu.org\/?p=3664"},"modified":"2018-01-02T11:18:22","modified_gmt":"2018-01-02T16:18:22","slug":"sunday-december-17-2017-its-a-wonderful-life-holiday-not-getting-what-we-want","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.gnhuu.org\/index.php\/2018\/01\/01\/sunday-december-17-2017-its-a-wonderful-life-holiday-not-getting-what-we-want\/","title":{"rendered":"Sunday, December 17, 2017, “‘It’s a Wonderful Life’ Holiday: Not Getting What We Want”"},"content":{"rendered":"

(c) Doug Slagle, Minister to the Gathering at Northern Hills, All Rights Reserved<\/p>\n

Click here to listen to the message or see below to read.<\/p>\n

Last Sunday I began my December message series entitled \u201c\u2018It\u2019s a Wonderful Life\u2019 Holiday\u201d with a look at one primary theme of the classic film:\u00a0 <\/span>each person has greatness within them.\u00a0 <\/span>We don\u2019t exist just to exist.\u00a0 <\/span>Instead, we live for a purpose and our task is to discover it and then live it out.\u00a0 <\/span>Ultimately, our reason for living is to leave this world better off than before we were born.\u00a0 <\/span>No matter how big or small we change things for the better, doing so is our greatness.\u00a0 <\/span>I quoted an old Jewish proverb, \u201cHe or she who saves even one life, saves the world entire.\u201d<\/b>\u00a0 <\/span>That\u2019s our purpose and it is in fulfilling it that we find our meaning.<\/span><\/p>\n

It takes George Bailey, the central character in the film, thirty plus years to understand his purpose.\u00a0 <\/span>He\u2019d been living it and practicing it, but he never understood, until a crisis comes, that he was already doing great things. <\/span><\/p>\n

The reason he takes so long to realize his purpose is due to an inner conflict – a fight between his dreams, and the reality of his life.\u00a0 <\/span>George does not get what he wants.\u00a0 <\/span>In his youth, George dreamed of being an architect who would build great structures – and thereby win fame and fortune.\u00a0 <\/span>On a date during high school, he tells his future wife this:<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m shakin\u2019 the dust <\/b><\/span>OF<\/i><\/b><\/span> this crummy little town off my feet and I\u2019m gonna see the world.\u00a0 <\/span>Italy, Greece, the Parthenon, the Colosseum.\u00a0 <\/span>Then, I\u2019m comin\u2019 back here to go to college and see what they know.\u00a0 <\/span>And then I\u2019m gonna build things.\u00a0 <\/span>I\u2019m gonna build airfields, I\u2019m gonna build skyscrapers a hundred stories high, I\u2019m gonna build bridges a mile long\u2026\u201d<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/b>Soon after he confides these dreams to Mary, his father suddenly dies.\u00a0 <\/span>George foregoes college and allows his younger brother to go instead.\u00a0 <\/span>He takes over the small Building & Loan bank his father had started.<\/span><\/p>\n

George continues to put aside his dreams to meet what he considered his <\/span>obligations<\/span>.\u00a0 <\/span>The greedy competing banker in town, Mr. Potter, tries to close the bank George runs by convincing its Board that the town no longer needs a Building and Loan. <\/span><\/p>\n

But George gives an impassioned speech to his Board describing the values his father believed in and the reason why he started the bank – not to make huge profits but to help average people buy homes and start businesses.\u00a0 <\/span>The world still needs such community spirited banks, he argued.\u00a0 <\/span>The Board agrees not to dissolve the bank only <\/span>IF<\/b><\/span> George remains its President.\u00a0 <\/span>George agrees.<\/span><\/p>\n

George had also made a pact with his younger brother.\u00a0 <\/span>He could go to college first – but when he finished, he\u2019d return to run the bank while George takes his turn to go to college.\u00a0 <\/span>But Harry the brother returns after graduating with a wife and a career. \u00a0 <\/span>With the kind of grace that only some show their siblings, George does not complain.\u00a0 <\/span>He stays on as President of a small, barely profitable bank.<\/span><\/p>\n

George then marries Mary and they make plans for a long honeymoon to travel the world – to fulfill at least one of George\u2019s dreams.\u00a0 <\/span>But the stock market crash of 1929 happens and there is a run on banks across the US.\u00a0 <\/span>People panic and they want their savings.<\/span><\/p>\n

As a near riot forms in George\u2019s bank, it faces collapse – much like thousands of other small banks during the Great Depression.\u00a0 <\/span>George could let his bank fail, take his honeymoon, go to college and become an\u00a0 <\/span>architect.\u00a0 <\/span>Instead, he uses the $2000 he\u2019d saved for his around the world honeymoon to pay the withdrawals his frightened customers want.\u00a0 <\/span>He saves the bank.<\/span><\/p>\n

Just before he decides to hand out his savings, he looks at a portrait of his father and reads underneath it his dad\u2019s life motto: \u201cAll you can take with you is that which you\u2019ve given away.\u201d<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/b>Years later <\/b>George faces his greatest crisis.\u00a0 <\/span>His kind but incompetent uncle, whom George employed in the bank, loses $8000.00 – a huge sum for the time.\u00a0 <\/span>The bank does not have enough cash to operate and it faces bankruptcy.\u00a0 <\/span>George faces personal ruin and even the prospect of prison.\u00a0 <\/span>Mr. Potter is overjoyed.\u00a0 <\/span>He can finally be rid of the bank that competes with him by making low interest loans.\u00a0 <\/span>He derisively tells George that he\u2019s worth more dead than alive.<\/span><\/p>\n

Suddenly, the inner battle George had fought all his life is clear.\u00a0 <\/span>He\u2019d honored his obligations at the cost of what he wanted.\u00a0 <\/span>He\u2019d fought against the ethics of Mr. Potter who symbolizes all that was wrong – and still is wrong – with America.\u00a0 <\/span>That\u2019s the idea that our purpose in life is to get all that we can.\u00a0 <\/span>Use and abuse others for profit.\u00a0 <\/span>Lie and steal to get ahead.\u00a0 <\/span>Demean others while bragging about yourself.<\/span><\/p>\n

In the middle of this crisis, George doubts all that his father stood for, his small town values, and his seemingly naive efforts to help others.\u00a0 <\/span>Mr. Potter is right, George concludes.\u00a0 <\/span>I should have done what I wanted and ignored serving and giving.\u00a0 <\/span>George returns to his dilapidated house a deeply embittered man.\u00a0 <\/span>Watch with me that movie scene:<\/span><\/p>\n

https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=LKco5Tv8ciw<\/span><\/a> <\/span><\/p>\n

Like many of you, I was inspired by Michael Tacy\u2019s message here two weeks ago.\u00a0 <\/span>As I listened to its recording, which is posted on our website, I realized that Michael\u2019s message on \u201cHonesty\u201d revealed someone who can speak to anyone – but particularly to young millennials.\u00a0 <\/span>Using humor and a down to earth style, Michael\u00a0 <\/span>– you can reach people in ways this old Minister cannot.\u00a0 <\/span>You spoke of emotional honesty – the kind we each need to develop.\u00a0 <\/span>We must be true to ourselves.<\/span><\/p>\n

It\u2019s in that light that I confess to you the same kind of struggle George Bailey battles in the film.\u00a0 <\/span>I sometimes fight the siren song of what I want – against what I believe is right.\u00a0 <\/span>That does not happen often – and usually when it does happen, I find my way back by listening to my better self.<\/span><\/p>\n

This inner conflict happened to me last month.\u00a0 <\/span>Due to a number of circumstances, I felt a lot of stress.\u00a0 <\/span>Ministers face stressful situations from time to time – extra work, longer hours, a few people who are critical.\u00a0 <\/span>Usually I deal with it, but last month I hit a low point and it happened again just this past Friday.\u00a0 <\/span>This is the kind of low that leads George, me, and others to feel as if our work is useless.\u00a0 <\/span>We despair that our lives are not what we want.\u00a0 <\/span>I confess this as a matter of honesty – and to share my inner struggles.<\/span><\/p>\n

Several friends and family members, after I shared my feelings last month with them, encouraged me to get what I sometimes think I want –\u00a0 <\/span>to end my work stress and take an early retirement.\u00a0 <\/span>Life is too short to be stressed and upset they told me.\u00a0 <\/span>Use the modest inheritance you received from your dad to support yourself – until Medicare and your retirement savings become available.\u00a0 <\/span>Retire now and enjoy life, they said.<\/span><\/p>\n

As tempting as that idea sounds, and as much as the pleasure seeking side of me wants that, I know it is not what my better self wants.\u00a0 <\/span>My better self wants to continue to serve, work and feel fulfilled.\u00a0 <\/span>I\u2019m abundantly blessed by what you allow me to do – and that you pay me to do it!\u00a0 <\/span>Most of the time I love my work and I remind myself I\u2019m a lucky guy.\u00a0 <\/span>It\u2019s a privilege to have this job. <\/span><\/p>\n

By not getting what I want – what the self-focused part of me wants – I\u2019m <\/span>paradoxically<\/i><\/span> getting instead what I truly want and need.\u00a0 <\/span>I truly want the kinds of things that last. <\/span><\/p>\n

This battle, what some call the desires of the flesh versus the wisdom of the soul, that\u2019s something many of us face.\u00a0 <\/span>We want expensive new things, but our hearts remind us the money can be better spent – or given – elsewhere.\u00a0 <\/span>We become unsatisfied with our houses, our spouses, our jobs, or what we\u2019ve saved, and we want new, bigger, sexier or more enjoyable improvements.\u00a0 <\/span>But it\u2019s our better selves that tell us there are true and good things to want instead – things that are consistent with what we believe.<\/i><\/b>\u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

All of this is true of George Bailey.\u00a0 <\/span>The lure of the wider world, going to college and becoming famous are very strong.\u00a0 <\/span>During much of his early life, he struggles with forsaking his dreams, even though the core of who he is, and what he believes, remind him to live a life of purpose and service.\u00a0 <\/span>George deeply believes the quote from his father.\u00a0 <\/span>We depart this world only with the things we\u2019ve given away – love, humility, kindness and caring.\u00a0 <\/span>Material things, money and pleasure won\u2019t last, nor are they meaningful.\u00a0 <\/span>What have we done to help or save other people – and thereby improve the world?\u00a0 <\/span>It\u2019s our good answer to <\/span>that<\/b><\/span> question that is our eternity, and our ticket to lasting greatness.<\/span><\/p>\n

The Dalai Lama once said, \u201cRemember that sometimes not getting what you want is a wonderful stroke of luck.\u201d<\/b>\u00a0 <\/span>He expressed a foundational idea of Buddhism.\u00a0 <\/span>By letting go of physical desires and wants, we ironically get what we <\/span>really<\/i><\/span> desire.\u00a0 <\/span>And what most of us really desire is a sense of contentment that is not affected by pleasure or pain. \u00a0 <\/span>We desperately want inner peace.<\/span><\/p>\n

To find that kind of joy, what the Dalai Lama speaks of in his book with Desmond Tutu, <\/span>The Book of Joy<\/span>, we must let go of wanting more<\/span>:<\/b><\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>more things, more money, more power, more prestige.\u00a0 <\/span>Wanting more of those things does not mean we\u2019ll get them – and not getting what we want leads to disappointment and anger.\u00a0 <\/span>That\u2019s what George feels when his world falls apart.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Real joy comes in letting go of the \u201cme, me, me\u201d prompts of ego.\u00a0 <\/span>It comes, instead, by serving, working, and caring.\u00a0 <\/span>It comes in quiet humility, gentleness of spirit and a sense of humor in the midst of challenge.\u00a0 <\/span>It comes in pouring out ourselves for the sake of others.<\/span><\/p>\n

For me, not getting what I want is, as I\u2019ve said, precisely what I DO want.\u00a0 <\/span>I know the side of me that can be selfish.\u00a0 <\/span>But that\u2019s not who I want to be nor what I believe is good.\u00a0 <\/span>I want instead meaning, purpose and a sense of fulfillment.\u00a0 <\/span>I want to make a difference – no matter how small.<\/span><\/p>\n

That idea from the film \u201cIt\u2019s Wonderful Life\u201d is a perfect one for the holidays.\u00a0 <\/span>It captures their essence.\u00a0 <\/span>This is a time to celebrate life, love and sharing.\u00a0 <\/span>We struggle to remember every holiday season the need to forego a desire for great parties, lavish meals and expensive gifts – to instead seek genuine peace and joy.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

What I hunger for at this time of year are moments to connect with others, to do something helpful for someone in need, and to measure my year\u2019s achievements not by what I got, but by what I gave.<\/span><\/p>\n

The world seems a particularly dark place this season.\u00a0 <\/span>A type of Mr. Potter seems to rule our culture and world.\u00a0 <\/span>Too many people are enthralled by his ways – the lying, cheating, insulting and grasping for power, prestige and wealth – all in order to glorify himself.\u00a0 <\/span>That\u2019s not a role model we want our children to follow.\u00a0 <\/span>And that\u2019s not how we ourselves want to act.\u00a0 <\/span>We each have the capacity to be much better.<\/span><\/p>\n

I pray that you and I defy what the darker side of humanity tells us we want.\u00a0 <\/span>Let us – this Hanukkah, Christmas, Solstice and holiday season – not want what we think we want.\u00a0 <\/span>Let\u2019s hold true to our values and beliefs and practice goodness, humility and kindness.\u00a0 <\/span>In doing so, we will get what we need and what we truly want – a life that <\/span>means<\/b><\/span> something and a life legacy that <\/span>lasts<\/b><\/span> into eternity\u2026<\/span><\/p>\n

I wish us each <\/span>THAT<\/b><\/span> kind of peace and joy\u2026 (introduce Cheryl and Spark) – One way this congregation serves and makes a difference, not just to address poverty and homelessness but also racism.\u00a0 <\/span>We advocate and speak to issues we care about with our hands on work.\u00a0 <\/span>Cheryl Leksan will now talk about Upspring.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

(c) Doug Slagle, Minister to the Gathering at Northern Hills, All Rights Reserved Click here to listen to the message or see below to read. Last Sunday I began my December message series entitled \u201c\u2018It\u2019s a Wonderful Life\u2019 Holiday\u201d with a look at one primary theme of the classic film:\u00a0 each person has greatness within […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3664","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.gnhuu.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3664","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.gnhuu.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.gnhuu.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.gnhuu.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.gnhuu.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3664"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.gnhuu.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3664\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3667,"href":"https:\/\/www.gnhuu.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3664\/revisions\/3667"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.gnhuu.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3664"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.gnhuu.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3664"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.gnhuu.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3664"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}